I remember the first time I heard the term “cuffing season”. It was during October of my sophomore year of college, and my roommate said something to the effect of “Better get on it, it is Cuffing Season after all”. I was intrigued by the concept. Fall is the time of year when we decide we absolutely must find a sexual and/or romantic partner. At the time I was too busy chugging Keystone and skipping 17 credits worth of class to really dissect the urban-dictionary oriented term.
Now, as a senior, and completely credible source for all things dating, relationships, and college – I thought I’d take a second look at the not-yet clichèd term.
1. Why Cuffing Season?
Cuffing Season represents the season just a few weeks into Fall when the autumn breeze blows leaves off of trees and love into our lives… Or, not so poetically put, it gets fucking cold and we realize that if we don’t yet have a mate we will have to walk our asses to parties and bars in the bitterly brisk nighttime air to half-heartedly look for one. It is the time of year when people who are not currently “wifed up” feel inherently inclined to find someone to spend the colorful season with. Think of it as totally tacit and biological, like birds migrating south for the winter, or better yet, like a squirrel collecting nuts.
But the cold weather is not solely to blame for this spike in companionship craving. Fall oriented activities cater completely to a couple’s dynamic, and can alone make you want to find a person, (ANY PERSON), to carve pumpkins with, ride hayrides with, watch sPo0oOky movies with, or have sex in a haunted house with. Wait, what?
2. Who to Cuff?
Not so fast friends, just because ’tis the season, doesn’t mean you should cuff with any scruff who glances your way, or for the sole sake of the “everyone’s doing it” age-old excuse.
Set yourself up with someone who, over everything else, you have a good time with. As aforementioned, cuffing season is really a product of Summer and its endless parties and fun times being over, so a seasonal mate that you can still have a LOT of fun with even while drinking on your couch is a necessity.
Don’t cuff up with a guy or gal that comes with drama. I know Santa’s infamous, “ho-ho-ho” may lead you to think otherwise, but when the weather gets colder, we all get a bit mushier and are so not looking for cheating/crying/yelling in the snow scandals. So if your cuff-buddy is constantly making you question things, get angry, or feel skeptical, then throw in the decorative towel and spend the fall and winter seasons with PSL and eggnog cocktails.
3. When You Feel Like You Don’t Friggin’ Wanna
Don’t ever base any of your life choices on the basis of being “seasonally appropriate”. Hell, in middle school I used to wear mini-skirts in the dead of winter just to count the number of people giving me side-eye, (though back then we didn’t have a name for it), #truestory. Do things because you want to!
So if you’re not feeling the spirit of this whole find-a-guy-to-text-when-your-drunk-at-Thanksgiving notion, then, by all means, forgo the cuffs! If you know you’re cool with having your single girl swag on then do you and be the girl who will show up to Halloween/Xmas parties alone, and look damn good doing so! The good news about not being cuffed to any casual cohort during the holiday season is that you can do what you damn please, and kiss whoever under the mistletoe. #Win
So get out your tight-knit sweaters ladies and find yourself an autumn man. You can cozy up through Halloween, and keep him close till the carols are sung. Just don’t plan on bringing him to turkey dinner. This season’s mates are often, well, just that.
Enjoy your seasonally sparked sluttiness.