We’re more connected than ever before. Access to an unlimited array of visual stimuli is literally at our fingertips. So, how does this change the way we have sex, and how is it informing our sexual tastes?
The Rise of Connectivity
Ten years ago, we were having twice as much sex as we do now. Can you believe it?! (With the rise of technology like Tinder and Grindr, you’d think we’d be doing it everywhere, any place, any time.)
Our decline in sex isn’t due to a lack of sexual desire though, it’s caused by a mixture of factors, including increased hyper-connectivity. Sexual pleasure is an important aspect of the human experience. Although advancing technology has encouraged the proliferation of easy-access pornography, and the explosion of more inclusive definitions of gender and sexuality, it has also resulted in our inability to switch off. Our work-obsessed, time-poor culture means that regular sex is a luxury, rather than a necessity. It’s something we’re willing to do without, or at least not prioritize.
As the boundaries between work lives and home lives are dissolved by technology and email, the mental space in which sex exists seems to be constantly under threat.
Redefining Sexual Expression
There has never before been a moment in human history when we’ve been surrounded by so much porn. Much of it is idealised and extreme, which is why movements redefining mainstream porn are so critical in the re-education of pleasure and sensuality.
The rise of ethical porn representing marginalised communities, alternative genders, and diverse sexualities is working to bring genuine pleasure back to porn. Ethical porn producers put performers’ safety and preference first, and their erotica aims to illustrate real sex (and real orgasms!) with a focus on female pleasure. Other ethical activists, such as Pandora Blake and Yvette Luhrs, campaign for sex workers’ rights. They help to reduce stigma and shame around sex work, by citing the importance of sexual expression and empowerment through sexual freedom.
Exploring Sexual Diversity
In today’s technological landscape, sex tech companies are always asking, “what can we do to enhance sexual experiences, yet never distract people from what’s really important? How can we use tech to bring people together?” Apps like MysteryVibe are designed with these values in mind. Tech designed to enhance, not hinder, relationships.
It’s not all negative though, there are two sides to the story. On one hand, the rise in new tech means sex is not always the spontaneous, animalistic, and primal activity it once was. However, technology also gives uncommon sexual cultures – formerly thought to be abnormal – a platform to thrive on. The palettes of our sexual desires have widely broadened. We’re undergoing a radical re-evaluation of what ‘sex’ and ‘pleasure’ mean. Sex is no longer geared towards reproduction, because our experiences of pleasure encompass so much more than that.
Continuously pushing the boundaries of what’s defined as ‘normal’ sex results in open-minded conversations of sexuality. Nobody is a freak anymore! You can revel in your tastes, desires, or fetish because there’s probably a community of people feeling exactly the way you do. We’re no longer labelling people – the industry is representing their interests and passions, which is an incredible development.
Access to enhanced sexual experiences through technology may mean we’re having less sex, on an average week, but it also means we’re continuously discovering ourselves sexually. We understand what we like, and we’re open to exploring that.
Let’s welcome tech with open arms, and embrace the positive impact it can have when we’re pleasuring ourselves, and our partners.