Slutty Girl Problems

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The Plus Size Slut

Sixteen. The age you earned the coveted driver’s license, maybe the age of your first boyfriend. It is the cost of a venti, multi-shot, fairy dusted coffee from Starbucks. Among many things, 16 is the average woman’s dress size in America.

In the fashion industry, models size eight and up are slapped with the label “plus.” We have launched a self-driving car, yet we still foster the barbaric culture of labeling women’s sizes. This world lives and breathes and dies by invented divisions such as race, gender, sexual orientation, and unfortunately, weight. We, as a society, are a body-occupied, beauty-infatuated, and dignity-shattering cultural machine.

Friends, this idiotic thinking has trickled into our sex lives. Sex is the time where day-to-day responsibilities should be forgotten, insecurities let go, and preconceived expectations left at the door. Sex is a time to be free and empowered. However, there’s a good chance the last time you did the dirty, you turned off the lights and tried to remember the 47 reasons Cosmopolitan guaranteed your guy would be begging for more. No matter what size we wear, we often take off our confidence with our clothes.

Remember the last lust piece in Cosmo or Glamour? There is a photo next to the article. A photo of the most attractive Calvin Klein couple rolling around in silk sheets paints the page. The woman is beautifully photoshopped and the lace lingerie perfectly flaunts her size zero body. You know the photo I am talking about because this lustful screenshot plasters not just magazines, but billboards, Instagram, and anywhere else your eyes could wander. This woman is not Ashley Graham or Tess Holliday. This is a woman is your typical model, but she is not the national average of size 16. Frankly, our featured, relatable slut is far from the size of the average reader. She is beautifully unrealistic.

Unfortunately, there is a difficult reality to embrace when you live life in a voluptuous bod. Victoria’s Secret models do not enter a boutique with the fear of not finding one single article of clothing that will fit them. Peers that ever so beautifully resemble a Forever21 print ad may not stay up at night wondering if a guy will see past their “extra offerings.” Self-imploding criticism and thoughts such as, “bodies say more than personalities, character, and intellect” are straight bullshit; however, they are part of a fierce reality that comes with modern day womanhood.

Not too long ago, I gladly succumbed to the Tinder culture until I was faced with the decision of choosing profile pictures. Even on my weak days I love my body, yet an overwhelming fear filled my entire brain space. Guys would realize I am a disgustingly real size of 16 (again: the national average). Naturally, I showcased three face selfies that were perfectly filtered; my profile pictures remained shoulder up. After swiping both left and right, it was time for the inevitable meet up. I was flooded with thoughts of self-doubt. “Do I need to tell him I am not a body replica of Kate Moss? Is he going to turn around when he sees me at the bar wearing my dress that was home to the plus size department?” My media infested brain was telling me I could not be a plus size slut.

My fellow busty babes reiterated the same unnecessary insecurities: “Beautiful, skinny girls are meant for Tinder.” “What if he doesn’t want to hook up anymore?” “I jiggle. He might not like that.” It hit me (almost as hard as that old shovel girl vine). Women, we are shaming ourselves. When did women come to believe there is only one type of “fuckable” body? I love sex. My body loves sex. My brain does not. My brain pictures a size two model with perfect breasts, luscious locks, and a tight, smackable booty representing all of us sluts (which is, completely ludicrous).

Our culture spoon feeds women advertisements, television shows, and movies that depict the term “slut” in a painfully shameful and limited way. These same ads and shows depict a sexually empowered woman once in a while, but she never looks like me. It is time to shatter the preconceived body associated with the label “slut.” A slut is sexually empowered regardless of race, gender, and, weight. If you are a size two, keep doing you, girl. If you are a size twenty, keep doing you, girl. Everyone has insecurities, but the epidemic here is the need for someone else to invalidate them. We need to invalidate the insecurities ourselves. Ladies, we simply do not need conform into a “sex- approved mold.” No matter what shape or size, embrace your own slutty self.

The Busty Babe // Editor

Avid Jameson drinker. Lipstick connoisseur. Sexting Enthusiast. Sass machine.

2 Comments to The Plus Size Slut

  1. YAAAAAAAAAAAS BAE

    I am also plus size and was so convinced no man was ever going to like me again. I was wrong and happily so, and have just as much of a fulfilling sex life as I’ve ever had.

  2. Jazmin Evers
    Editor

    Super late reply – but I love this column and think it offers wisdom for sluts of all sizes!

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