Oral sex! While some people think of it as foreplay, oral sex can be and is just another form of sex all on its own. For many straight cis men, it is the hottest and most fantasized type of sex. For many people with vaginas, it is one of the most efficient ways to obtain orgasm, given that 70% of women need clitoral stimulation to come. So, if you haven’t tried oral sex yet, you may be missing out on a lot of great sex! If you have, but aren’t very confident yet, here are some hot tips to get you started. Even if you’re a pro, you can always perfect your technique!

If your partner has a vagina…

Foreplay: The key to oral sex is, of course, stimulating the erogenous zones. The main zone is the clitoris, and it is highly sensitive. However, no matter how hard you try, a person with a vagina isn’t going to get off if you don’t warm them up first. In fact, the longer you lick, suck, kiss and fondle them elsewhere (yes, avoid the clitoris altogether!), the more they are going to want it. Don’t forget foreplay!

After you’ve made out for a while, you can kiss your way down to the vulva. There, lick all over the vulva including the inner labia, the vaginal opening and the U-spot, and all around the clitoris, but avoid licking the clitoris directly. Teasing your partner like this will drive them insane!

Don’t forget the U-spot:  While the most sensitive area is the clitoris, the U-spot (the up-side-down U on top of the urethra opening) is also an erotic zone and linked to squirting. So, don’t forget to lick there. Madeleine Castellanos, MD says to use lots of lube or saliva, and to lick it like an ice-cream cone, licking from vagina to clitoris.

If you’re looking for lube, Wicked is our absolute favorite.

The Hottest Spot: Most people with clits have a super sensitive hot spot on the clitoris. It is on the upper left or right hand side at about 10-11 o’clock or 1-2 o’clock. Try stimulating all around the clitoris, paying special attention to the upper portion, and ask your partner to tell you which area does it for them. Once you find it, focus your oral techniques there.

If your partner has a penis…

Be Enthusiastic: Your partner wants to know that you are into it. So be hungry! Or, at least act like you are. You don’t have to devour them, but make sure you are enjoying giving your partner a blowjob and let him know it. Be enthusiastic, makes lots of sounds, tell them how hot it is, and let them know it is turning you on to get them off.

Eye Contact: You’ve probably heard this before, but making eye contact while giving a blowjob is a major turn on. Again, this has to do with the enjoyment factor, especially if you are giving your partner naughty, sultry looks.

The Hot Spots: The hottest spots on a penis are the ridge that goes around the underside of the head (the corona), and the frenulum, the elastic band of tissue under the head that connects to the shaft or foreskin. Make sure to give lots of attention to those areas to put your partner over the edge.

Don’t Forget the Scrotum: Yes, the balls. Again, a very sensitive area. You can lick and gently suck their balls and scrotum as a part of foreplay. Also, cupping them in your hand and even tugging on them a bit can be very pleasurable.

To Deep Throat or Not?: Lots of people fantasize about this because it’s all we see in porn. However, it is not the be all and end all of blow jobs. If you want to try to tlearn how to do deep throat, you need to practice. Seriously, that’s how porn stars get so good at it! First of all, you need to stop the gag reflex. Before doing this with a partner, you can try it on a banana or dildo. Also, don’t forget to breathe out of your nose. Practice makes perfect!

For both your pleasure!

Good Hygiene is Hot: Well, it’s hotter than the alternative, right? A huge turn off for sex is bad hygiene. If you think there is a chance you might be having oral, make sure your privates are nice and clean beforehand. If you have a vagina, you can put sex wipes in your purse to wipe up quickly just before. If you have a penis, go to the washroom and give it a quick wash with soap and water. Oh, and don’t forget behind the balls.

Try these wipes from Lovehoney, which can also be used with toys.

While we are still on hygiene, whether you should trim, wax, or shave your pubic hair or go “au-naturel” is a personal preference. However, keeping it trimmed is generally a good and courteous idea. If you’re going to shave, make sure there is no stubble, because whisker burn is not sexy. If you are going to get a full Brazilian, again, you might want to try to ensure that you are nice and smooth.

Sexy Talk: Talking during sex can be very sexy. And, it is also important for communication reasons. Encourage your partner to let you know how you are doing and reciprocate the favor for them. Afterwards, talk about what you enjoyed, what things you’d like to work on, and what you don’t want to try again.

Oral Sex Tools: Your tongue, lips and teeth are all the tools in your oral tool box. Use your lips to kiss and suck, your tongue to lick and flicker, and your teeth to softly nibble. Use the flat of your tongue for soft wet strokes or the tip for more pressure and stimulation.

Hands: Don’t forget to use your hands during oral sex. If your partner has a penis, it can act as part of the oral process with your mouth stimulating the head of the penis and your hands holding the shaft and balls. If you’re going down on someone with a vagina, you can insert a finger or two into the vagina and stimulate their G-spot while licking their clitoris. Hot, hot, hot!

Oral Sex Products: Finally, there are lots of oral sex products on the market to help you out. Lubes are awesome and there are many different types, from flavored ones to ones that make you tingle and ones that help partners’ with penises last longer. There are also products that, when taken a bit beforehand, makes your cum taste sweeter. Then there are sexual enhancement creams that increase stimulation to the genital area once applied, as well as sex candies that add an effect, too. And, don’t forget condoms. STDs and STIs virus can be transmitted during oral sex. Editor’s note: It’s also important to review the ingredients of oral sex products. Products with sugar, for example, can cause yeast infections.

Written by: Domina Doll

Domina Doll is a sex writer, sexpert, and sex toy diva at PopMyCherryReview.com as well as a certified Passion & Pleasure Coach from Loveology U (2013). She has dabbled as a fetish photographer, filmmaker, artist, and jill of all trades, but her passion is teaching others about positive sexuality, intimacy and how to have passion-filled relationships. Her work has been published in several sex related magazines including Women’s Health, Lover Magazine, Whiplash!, SMUT, Good Vibes, Carnal Nation, SexLifeCanada and Blog Her (Sex). She is also the go to sexy gal at AllExperts.com, where she answer questions about sex toys and sexuality in general. Domina has also ghostwritten sexpert e-books as well as her own sex guides including: “Jillin’ Off: A Girl’s Guide to Solo Sex”.