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The Slutty Girl’s Guide to Dating Apps

We’ve all been there, and in the modern era there’s no longer shame or stigma attached to it: online dating. While that organic, beautiful moment of meeting someone for the first time is lost, using an app or a website to date makes things so much easier. The nerves, worry, and fear of rejection are completely taken out of the situation when the person you’re chatting up is nowhere nearby.

I’m no stranger to online dating. Off and on for the past several years, I’ve been toying with or actually enjoying (or hating) the process of online dating. A true student of the world, I’m still learning about the process, but I’ve tried out my share of apps and websites.

With summer fast approaching, many a slutty girl might be looking for the next thing – whether it’s a heated fling, a hot one night stand on an equally hot night, or summer love. In the modern world, dating apps might be the best way to go. From JSwipe to Grindr, there’s an app to meet everyone’s needs. Since I’m not Jewish or a gay man, I don’t use these apps, and therefore really can’t review them. However, there are seven apps I have given a try, three of which still keep their place on my iPhone. Here’s my review of seven dating apps I know and adore, hate, or something in between.

1. Tinder

Perhaps the most obvious of the dating apps is Tinder, an app that anyone who’s been single since its release has downloaded at one point or another. For those who live under a rock, the app involves swiping left or right on a photo of a person with a brief “About Me” attached. It’s shallow and heartless, but so is most online dating.

Using GPS, Tinder shows you those who are also in the area, up to a radius that you define. If you both like one another, then a conversation between you is enabled. A bonus of Tinder is that it shows mutual Facebook friends and likes. Though most people don’t keep their liked pages constantly updated, the visible list of mutual friends makes things feel a bit more secure. This person can’t be totally fake if someone else knows they exist.

My experience: I’ve met four men off of Tinder. One was a crazy stalker, another I went on a good date with, but we just didn’t click, and two others I hooked up with/dated and remained friends with – one I still might be dating? (I don’t know – but that’s a story for another day.) Since nearly everyone has a Tinder, I think it’s definitely the best app for meeting people.

The cons: On that same note, a lot of guys on Tinder are just wasted messaging you at 2 a.m. or looking for sex or nudes. If that’s what you’re looking for – yay! If not, you’ll have to do some wading to find a dude you actually want to date.

The verdict: Best used if you’re looking for attention or sex when you’re drinking, but it’s possible to score a relationship off of here.

Still on my phone? Yes.

 

2. OkCupid

Another one of the go-to apps/websites: OkCupid. The concept is simple: It shows you matches local to your area. Anyone can message anyone else, regardless of your sexuality, location, or what you’re looking for. A brief profile scan can show you exactly what it is another person wants, whether they’re looking for short term dating, the real thing, casual sex, or friendship.

OkCupid is great in that it not only offers pictures and a basic “About” section, but the profile form has some interesting sections that show you more about a person, such as six things they can’t live without or the most embarrassing thing they are willing to admit. Furthermore, each profile contains a compatibility score based off of personality quiz style questions you can answer at any time.

My experience: In all of my years on this site, I’ve only actually met one guy off of it. We short-term dated and he turned out to be an asshole. However, I’m currently on Round 1,098 of OkCupid and I have to say that it’s the most user-friendly of all the dating sites and has something to offer to everyone. If you’re just looking for casual sex, you can find it here, but same goes for a serious relationship. I’m excited to see what happens this time around!

The cons: You’ll get a lot of creepy messages that just say things like “Hey sexy” and “kissesssssssssss.” Also, there are complete jerks on there who will verbally attack you if you take too long to reply. However, there’s a good reporting system in place. If you ignore or fight back against the bad, then you can focus more on the good.

The verdict: It takes a lot of effort, but no matter what you’re looking for, you can find it on OkCupid.

Still on my phone? Yes.

 

3. Plenty of Fish

Based off of the old adage, “There are plenty of fish in the sea,” POF offers, well… Plenty of fish. There are so many users to connect with, whether you are looking for a casual date or more. Despite the fact that they claim to use a matching algorithm, I’m pretty sure just about any random can show up on your match list. Since it’s profile is a bit easier to fill out than other dating profiles, I don’t think it establishes much as far as intellectual conversation goes. That being said, I have not been a very active user on this site since 2010, and from my brief experiences since, it’s clear that there have been some updates.

Nicknamed POF, this app is definitely up there in popularity. A lot of people have it, and in my college years I frequently stumbled across people I knew in real life, which has its ups and downs. If you’re looking for just what the title of the app suggests – plenty of profiles to explore – then this is the app for you.

My experience: Though friends have met guys off of this app, I’m just not a fan of it – mostly because I don’t feel the type of men who use this site are my type. POF is very user-friendly, but I’m looking for something a bit more. Even if it’s just for a hook up, I like to delve more into someone’s personality, and I just don’t feel this website allows that.

The cons: The concept of having “plenty” of people to check out can be great but is mostly intimidating and overwhelming when it comes to online dating.

The verdict: This is a good dating app for someone, but that someone is not me.

Still on my phone? No.

 

4. Happn

The concept of Happn is awesome. Every time you cross paths with someone else who has the app, your phone is alerted and updated with the amount of times this has happened. If both people like one another, they’re able to chat. This is a great way to meet people who live in the town, work in the same building, or go to the same events as you.

My experience: It’s a great concept, but as a suburban girl, I really think it’s better for those who live in bigger cities or towns. I only had the app for a few weeks because 1) the constant GPS usage kind of murdered my phone and 2) I wasn’t getting enough people on there, either because the app just isn’t popular yet or because of where I frequent. I was only getting matched with the dude who drove past my house at 2:30 am with his bass bumping and some guy who also gets his medication at my pharmacy.

The cons: There you have it: Shitty for suburbanites.

The verdict: If I’m still single by the time I scrounge up enough money to live downtown, I’ll try this app again. It’s ideal for those in an urban area or on a college campus.

Still on my phone? No – but maybe one day!

 

5. Coffee Meets Bagel

I want to like Coffee Meets Bagel. I really do. The concept is awesome for those who hate the barrage most single girls face when dating online. Every day at noon, you’re matched with a new friend of a Facebook friend. You can like their profile and begin talking if they’ve liked yours, or next them and wait until tomorrow at noon.

Some people may find popular apps intimidating with how much your inbox can get flooded – if you just haven’t hit it off with anyone, it can get a bit disheartening. Since you only get one match a day on this app, it’s won’t get overwhelming. Presumably someone is at least tolerable if you have a mutual Facebook friend, but if you don’t like your daily match, then there’s a day wasted!

My experience: I had this app for a week and had two mutual matches who I didn’t even end up talking to. A friend of mine has met people off this app, though, so maybe it’ll work for you.

The cons: While the concept is awesome for those whose dating profile inboxes are generally flooded, it’s not social enough for me. Also, what’s with the name? Who is the coffee? Who is the bagel? What if my match doesn’t even like breakfast?

The verdict: I mean, the concept is cool, so it’s worth a shot.

Still on my phone? No.

 

6. Hinge

In my opinion, Hinge is the champagne version of Coffee Meets Bagel. Every day at noon, you’re met with a batch of matches with whom you share mutual Facebook friends. If you both like one another, you can talk. Since you get more than once match, there’s a higher chance of actually getting to talk to someone.

If you’re looking to reconnect with a high school crush or meet someone who travels in the same social circles as you, it’s worth a try. Hinge is everything Coffee Meets Bagel isn’t – i.e. more social – and everything Tinder wants to be – classy and reputable. Plus, it’s definitely popular enough that most of my friends know what it is.

My experience: For me, Hinge was more about avoiding high school dudes than actually meeting someone, so I deleted it. Recently, a friend of mine began dating someone off of here. I’ve met him and he seems awesome enough that I may have to give the app another try.

The cons: I didn’t like half of these guys in high school and I still don’t like them.

The verdict: You can meet some quality guys off of here! Just because I didn’t doesn’t mean you can’t.

Still on my phone? No, but I might try again.

 

7. Grouper

Imagine going on a blind date with half of your nerves taken away – and this time, you get to bring some friends! The bonus is that your date does as well. Though you’ve been matched with a particular person, he brings two friends, so if you don’t hit it off with the guy chosen for you, someone else might be your match. When it was first created, Grouper was a blind date service where someone was hand-picked for you after you asked a few questions. I used the app twice during this period and absolutely adored it. Now, you are given a list of matches who you can swipe yes or no on, just like on Tinder.

It costs $20 to actually schedule a date, and you and two wingwomen must pay that price. You choose who you bring with you, and so does your blind match, though you’ve technically chosen the match at some point. What’s great about Grouper is that you are in constant communication with your concierges – the people who run the app.  Two sets of guys or two sets of girls can also meet up depending on what you’re looking for. The more Groupers you go on and the more people you invite, the more points you earn, and the more personal a relationship you develop with those setting up your dates. The time is set up by you, while the developers pick your place and buy you your first round of drinks. It really is a fun idea.

My experience: I went on two Groupers. The first was amazing – I liked my match but ended up hitting it off and hooking up with his friend. The second was a dud, but still fun.

The cons: It costs money to actually go on the dates and only certain people get accepted; You apply to the app and they invite you into it. A few of my friends haven’t been accepted and I’ve noticed that my only other mutual Facebook friend who has the app is a lot like me – big on social media usage and conventionally attractive. I have a hunch that the app creators are just doing this while Grouper gets its feet off the ground so there’s more social media hype related to it.

The verdict: If you have the cash to drop now and again, this is a really fun blind date idea!

Still on my phone? Yes!  I have my notifications turned off, which I had no idea how to do until my concierge informed me – via text! I can contact her at any time with questions, which is awesome.

 

In conclusion…

If you’re looking for someone to date this summer, give online dating a shot. It’s fun and an experience every single lady should try. Give one of these apps a try, and if it’s not for you, move on to the next! When it comes to online dating, there’s something for everybody. Have fun, stay safe, and always stay true to yourself!

crazyandbitchy // Editor

Part time nice girl, full time bitch. Moved back home after college, but still remains a party girl at heart. Can often be found sipping cheap wine, making out with her latest Tinder match, reading romance novels, or blowing up Twitter. Lover of carbs and outspoken female pop stars. Hater of Candy Crush Saga invites on Facebook.

2 Comments to The Slutty Girl’s Guide to Dating Apps

  1. crazyandbitchy
    Post Author
    Editor

    Unfortunately Grouper is no longer around! I lived for that app. I hope someone else comes up with something similar and more successful. (Maybe it should be me.)

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