If you’re looking for BDSM-friendly dating websites to give you a digital platform to satisfy the kinkiest edges of your desires, we recently had the opportunity to check out BDSM Dating Only, a new platform in the online fetish field to connect online. It may look a bit barebones from the outside, yet BDSM Dating Only has a ton of unique and in-depth features, from long lists of potential kinks to choose from, and even the ability to stream a webcam for tips.
BDSM Dating Only boasts over a million active members, with over 250,000 videos and 4,000 live cams to view. From where I am in the NYC area, the site says there are over 100,000 members near me. As you join, you’re prompted to create a free account before you can access anything. You can sign up for free to test out the features, though free members can’t initiate contact with other members or view their profiles.
Filling out Your Profile
When I signed up, I was comforted by the fact that instead of first asking me to enter my gender (like many dating websites), it focused on “kink orientation” including master, mistress, dom, submissive, slave, switch – to prioritize different relationship styles and kink preferences before gender or orientation. When I did reach the gendered portion, it gave me several options to choose from, including male, female, couple, group, trans, and a number of others. You can also enter your sexual orientation, body types, marital status, and a quick bio to say a bit about yourself.
As you deepen your profile, the profile serves as a more complex dating app where you can enter personal details like you have kids, if you drink or not, and many other lifestyle choices. This part of the process is fairly similar to an average in-depth online dating site where you have the option to include a lot of info about yourself and what you’re looking for – from the more tame to the risque.
Where it gets exciting is when you start entering information about your kinks. Their kink directory is extremely comprehensive. At this time this review was written, you can choose from nearly nine full pages of extremely detailed and niche kinks, and they’re adding more all the time. You’ll find everything from corsetry and cosplay to confinement and chastity. No matter how detailed, specific, or unique your kink is, there’s a very good chance you’ll find it here. For what it’s worth, I’ve NEVER seen this many kinks in my life. It’s hard to shock me with anything, and yet, not only was I blown away by the sheer amount of kinks they have, I discovered a bunch of new kinks I had never heard of! To make this feature extra user-friendly, clicking any kink link will quickly perform a search and show you the profiles of everyone into that kink.
The Community
The number of features available to you once your profile set up is also impressive. You can create a network of friends and message them, upload photos and videos of yourself indulging in your kinks, and if you feel inspired to write, you can start a kink blog.
As an added feature to find good-fit play or romantic partners who share your desire, you can even fill out a question and answer section where you answer questions about very practical and relevant topics related to boundaries, experience, and community. This is a great place to share your thoughts and background on all things related to BDSM: how active you are in your local community, your favorite fantasies and toys, your hard and soft limits, what you’re open to, what you want to try, your experience is around all different types of play, and your involvement in your local kink community. Even if you don’t fill the questions out, you can look at these questions to help give you ideas on what you should be asking people as you start reaching out and making connections, to help determine if a partner is safe, respectful, knowledgeable, and shares the same kinks.
As you navigate through the site, you’ll find lots of nice little touches that show the creators of BDSM Dating Only understand the needs of the community. One such feature is testimonials on profiles. If you have a kink experience with someone, you can essentially leave reviews on other people’s profiles, commenting on how well the session went, whether they respected your boundaries, and anything else you want to give feedback on. This is extremely useful for getting a sense of who is safe and reputable in the community, and even though you still should do your own due diligence when meeting anyone from the internet, but still helpful to know who they’re interacting with and the quality of interactions.
Signing Up
Paid plans are broken down into two options: Silver and Gold. Both plans can view and contact members, although gold plans have priority in contacting new members, and will be placed higher in search results (they promise 10x more responses), along with access to higher-resolution photos, and full access to members’ recorded intro videos along with blogs, groups, and magazine features. Silver plans have limited access to recorded intro videos, blogs, and groups, but considering the similar price point between the two when buying a 3- or 12-month subscription, Gold seems like the better option.
Our Thoughts
Even though the website looks a little barebones from the outside, there are actually a ton of surprisingly in-depth features. I found the platform to be much more robust than I expected, and you can use it to do just about anything kink related: view amateur videos and save your favorites, make new connections with other members in your area, and even start a webcam account and receive tips and gifts. If you’re looking to explore the community or expand your connections, BDSMdatingonly.com is an in-depth option to learn more and explore your desires.
