I love dating apps, and I have no shame when it comes to my excessive use of them. But they definitely have their downsides – endless conversation with no follow through, matches that are miles away by the time you actually chat, sifting through profiles that aren’t looking for the same things as you. I’ve often experienced the frustration of matches who are happier sending unsolicited dick pics that meeting up in person. Luckily, Pure has a solution to many of these common dating and hookup app dilemmas.
Pure is designed to only show you people who are available and willing to meet at the same time as you are: right now. Pure is designed to give you “Private Afterdark Adventures” with an unusual twist, so the majority of your matches will be found at night. It also means that everyone you do match with is up for adventure whenever you are. It all boils down to quality over quantity.
On Pure, you put out a meeting request for one hour, which includes one photo of yourself, and you can then view other profiles that are available at the same time. If there’s a mutual interest, it’s a match and you have one hour until your chat self-destructs. That’s just enough time to share extra photos, some information about yourself, your desires, and what you’re looking for – and make plans to meet up! Another thing that makes Pure different is that it also shows which users have already liked you, so that you can prioritize them and start chatting sooner. Once your hour is up, that’s it, your profile is gone and nothing is stored on the server; it’s fast, simple, and discreet.
Pure in Action
I recently spent a weekend in New York City where I had the opportunity to try Pure myself, and it more than exceeded my expectations! I had an absolutely incredible time and met five completely different guys, proving there is definitely someone for everyone when it comes to this app. Don’t believe me? Read on and tell me that at least one of these guys doesn’t sound like he might be just your type…
The Kinky One
My first date in NYC was perhaps not someone well suited for me, but he would be perfect for all of you kinksters out there.
I met Matt* on Friday night at a Starbucks for coffee, but it was clear from the get-go that he didn’t plan on staying long. I’m not sure he would even have ordered a drink at all, had I not been holding one of my own already. Nonetheless, it gave us time to chat and get to know each other a bit. He told me that he had recently moved to New York from Los Angeles for school. He was studying fashion but more interested in acting and filmmaking, with some modeling on the side. In other words, he was the epitome of all things stereotypically New York.
As our conversation continued on, it became apparent that we had many things in common – I had a brief two-year stint as a drama major once upon a time, and we had similar feelings about travel and discovering the trajectory of your life. He told me that he believed life was about trying different things until you have, “a paradigm shifting experience that makes you realize what you should really be pursuing.” It was getting late though, so with Starbucks about to close, we headed back to my hotel to continue our conversation.
Once back at my hotel, the conversation eventually drifted to the topic of what each of us was looking for. Matt was looking to get pegged. To be fucked in the ass with a strap-on. Now, I (a) don’t judge, and (b) am willing to try almost anything once. As it so turns out though, pegging is not something I am into, at all, even a little bit. So I was relieved when he asked if I could talk dirty to him instead, now, that’s something I’m familiar with.
Except, he wasn’t into just any dirty talk, he was into small penis humiliation. Again, I’ll try almost anything once, but I failed miserably. I am too nice to venture, even vaguely, into dominatrix territory. I could not tell him his dick was pathetic or tiny (like he asked), and felt the need to reassure him that it was quite average and fine.
He egged me on. “So it’s average? Just average? Very plain. Boring even.”
“It’s not boring, it’s fine. I mean… it could be better. I guess. There’s always room for improvement. There’s nothing wrong with it. I don’t know.” Never have I felt so out of my depth sexually before. Insulting a naked and vulnerable person unprovoked did not arouse me. It made me feel mean.
So with that, we parted ways.
I’ll admit, I was feeling a little discouraged at this point. Perhaps I was too vanilla for Pure, perhaps it wasn’t right for me. Little did I know, my dates would only get better.
The Dream Guy
My next suitor was literally a fantasy guy. Not my fantasy per se, but someone’s. To begin with, Leonardo* was 28 years old, which is about ten years older than the guys I usually go for (#CougarsGonnaCoug).
I met Leonardo for lunch on Saturday and we stayed for a few drinks afterwards, all of which was paid for by him, because he was a traditional, gentlemanly, kind of guy. From the moment we met, he was nothing but generous, chivalrous, and lovely. He shared with me his adventurous life, traveling throughout Brazil and Morocco, before settling in New York. We discussed politics, feminism, and how the media portrays the two.
After lunch, he gave me a tour of Columbia University and showed me around his home neighbourhood of Harlem, as we discussed gentrification. He politely asked if he could hold my hand and then grabbed it to run across the street, narrowly avoiding an errant taxi and said, “It’s always an adventure here!” In that moment, I felt as though I was starring in a romantic comedy …but I despise romantic comedies. He was someone’s dream suitor, just not mine.
Leonardo invited me back to his place, an invitation I gladly accepted, and things began to get steamy. I already had prior commitments for later that evening, so had to leave before things could progress too far, though not before he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear mid-makeout. I’m not really a sweet nothings kinda gal, but being called a beautiful, smart, independent woman is flattering in any context. (Not to mention whatever else it was that Leonardo was whispering to me in Portuguese!) He asked me to stay the night instead and have breakfast together in the morning, calling me his “Canadian princess” and letting me know an invitation to return was always open for the future…
I didn’t know how to read this guy. He paid for all my drinks at three separate bars, but he made no moves and I didn’t get any romantic/sexual vibes from him. By the end of the night, he seemed like someone I would likely hang out with and be friends with, a bro so to speak, but nothing further.
Mike* and I met for drinks at the crowded but fun Ace Bar, moved on to a quieter dive bar, stopped by Coyote Ugly, and went on a failed quest for hotdogs at the end of the night. We talked about video games (from Duck Hunt to Guitar Hero), dating apps and the bar scene, and Netflix. He told me that he and his friends would dress up in full costume to play Guitar Hero and recommended I watch Love on Netflix. It was basically the kind of conversation you’d expect from a friend. There was no allusions to anything further.
There came a point in the evening when we discussed (a) that Mike had moved to New York after a breakup, and (b) two other girls he’d met through Pure, one who was looking strictly for a hookup:
“She made it pretty clear that she just wanted a one-time thing, so I just went over to her apartment. It was fun!”
I was pretty sure this was my ‘in’ – he was talking about rebounds and casual sex, he knew I was only in the city for the weekend, and he admitted to hooking up with another Pure user before. So, unable to satisfy our search for a hotdog vendor and late night food cravings, we let go of exploring the city to go explore each other…
The One with the Dog
Possibly my most adventurous date was meeting up with Isaac* and his rescue dog in New Jersey. Not adventurous per se perhaps, but I certainly wouldn’t have thought to leave the city on my own.
I took the train out to Hoboken where Isaac and his rambunctious black lab met me at the station before we headed to a dog park for a while. Getting to know Isaac was a bit of a surprise actually. Judging by his shirtless six-pack baring picture on Pure, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to meet with him. I likely would have moved on if he hadn’t suggested such an unconventional date.
In person though, he was almost shy and quieter than I would have guessed, and a fair bit nerdy as well (I say this not as an insult, as I’m actually a huge closet nerd myself – though my Pokemon-loving, Dune-reading persona tends to get overshadowed by my sex-toy reviewing, slut reputation persona). And I know it’s cliché to say, but I also found his love and devotion for his dog heart-warming. I didn’t learn a lot about Isaac in our initial conversations, but I did hear a lot of adorable and laughable stories detailing the mischief that his dog had gotten up to since his adoption. After the dog park, he showed me around Jersey City, including breathtaking views of NYC from afar.
By this time, we had to stop by his apartment to take home his very tired-out puppy. He invited me inside, warning me that he and his roommate liked to describe their décor choices as, “if two grandmothers started a frat.” It was a surprisingly accurate description.
As Isaac was getting his dog settled into his kennel with some treats, I was noticing his impressive library of books, including almost enough classic science fiction novels to rival my own collection. And you know what John Waters says…
“If you go home with someone and they don’t have books, don’t fuck ‘em!”
Well. I took that to mean that the opposite was true as well.
If you’ve never slept with someone who is in incredibly good shape (did I mention he’s an athletic and personal trainer?), I would highly recommend that you do. He had almost unending stamina, certainly way more stamina than I, an unapologetically lazy girl who had just climbed eight flights of stairs to get to his place, could possibly muster. In addition to unending stamina, he also is someone you definitely want to get to know if you’re a fan of oral sex – tongue game on fleek.
Following that marathon (really, there’s no other word) in the bedroom, he offered to drive me back to the train station. This was a pleasant change from New York, where no one drives. It was also completely necessary though because anyone who thinks that I still had enough energy to walk back across town is hugely mistaken.
The Netflix and Chill Guy
I first matched with Brandon* on Pure on Friday, then again on Saturday, and also on Sunday, and a few times in between as well. We chatted through the app, and exchanged phone numbers, but our plans to actually meet never quite worked out.
Then, on Sunday night, my last night in the city, as I was taking in the view from the Empire State Building, who should text me, but Brandon? It was late and I had an early flight the next morning, and it was pretty clear that he was just looking for a Netflix and Chill arrangement. Minus the Netflix, that is.
I was extremely apprehensive to just show up at someone’s house at night. (Anyone who knows me will know that prior to Pure, I was very paranoid. I’m the kind of person who would creep every social media site possible before meeting someone, to make sure I wasn’t talking to a serial killer.) I felt a little more secure due to the fact that I’d been chatting with him off and on all weekend. In hindsight, however, hanging around his neighborhood outside at night and texting him to come get me probably wasn’t the safest idea. But hey! I’m still alive!
Like most times you have sex with someone new, it was …okay, at best. I can’t complain, but you won’t hear me raving about it either. In fact, when friends ask me if I hooked up with anyone while in New York, I sometimes gloss over Brandon completely due to sheer mediocrity. It’s not that it was bad, it’s that it was nothing special. That being said, if I lived in New York and was on the market for a regular ongoing fuck buddy, things might be different. I probably would’ve hit him up again, at least once, to see how it improved.
Pure at a Glance
Pure is so much more than just a hookup app. They promise to give users a unique, adventurous experience, and in my experience, they definitely exceeded the expectation. It also gives you the opportunity to meet all sorts of people. Whether you’re looking for a kinky new sub, your future husband, someone to hang out with on the weekends, friends-with-benefits, or just casual sex – you’ll find it on Pure! Finding someone new and exciting, all while not knowing how the encounter will grow, is all part of the thrill of PURE. And the best part is they’re all willing to meet up RIGHT NOW, no waiting and no beating around the bush. I honestly can’t say enough good things about my experience with Pure!
Learn more about PURE
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Note: This review is sponsored, and I was compensated for travel to NYC to try PURE in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are 100% honest and my own. I only recommend things I would use myself! Read more about my reviews.
This is a really great app
Just for fun