When dealing with all the emotions and changes happening to you after a breakup, it is quite common to instinctively want to text, call, or perhaps show up to his front door and beg to get back together. Many of us have at least a handful of times after a breakup seem to lose our appetites and constantly dissect what went wrong in the relationship. This could even go as far as hittin’ up that ex …and next thing you know you and him are tangled in the sheets and the lines have blurred even further.

Alas, listed here are eight things to do post-breakup if you’d rather feel refreshed instead of ending up under your ex.

1. Take Up a New Hobby

An easy way to distract yourself from jumping back into your ex’s bed is to take up a new hobby. This can be a multitude of things such as learning a new recipe, hiking a new trail, gaming, or knitting. Taking up a new hobby has been linked to helping cope with the stresses of life and structures free time. After a major breakup, a need to restructure your life is necessary, and with the help of a new hobby, like learning to sew, slowly but surely the frequent thoughts will lessen of that pesky ex.

2. Go Out With the Girlfriends

Probably the most important people to you in the time of a post-breakup are going to be your girlfriends. The friends that you had gushed to, complained to, and in the end, embraced their hugs after the fights. Post-breakup is a great time to dedicate all your energy to making plans with your girlfriends. Try going to the club and dance your looming thoughts away. Your girlfriends will be your life-lines, and the ones who will be there for the good times and the mascara-dripping bad times.

3. Sweat it Out

No, not that kind of “workout”. I’m talking about sweating it out at the gym. Through physical fitness, you reap the benefits of positive mental health and toning that butt for the coming summer. Hitting the gym after breaking up is a great way to get all that feisty anger out of you through a channel that is healthy and won’t hurt anyone. You’ll be too busy lifting those weights to ever think about him.

4. Volunteer

A feel-good way that not only can deter away from break up thoughts but is also good for your community, is to volunteer at your local food bank or animal shelter. Volunteering not only distracts you but is great for supporting a cause and helping organizations that help the people and animals in need. So go check your local volunteering organizations and see what you can do!

5. Meditate

Meditation is a great way to re-focus and re-center oneself spiritually. It doesn’t matter if you have a whole day or only five minutes, meditating can help drastically change your outlook on life especially after a gloomy break-up. The great part about meditation is that there is no one way to do it, depending on what you like and what helps you, meditation can be anything. A good basic meditation practice is to lie flat on the ground, in a quiet place where you can focus on breathing in and out through the nose. With each breath, you want to try to slow down and lengthen the breathing. This can help re-focus your mind and wipe the mental slate.

6. Change your Look

Treat yo’self! One of the best things to do right after a break up is to change that hair color and get those nails done. Changing your hair color truly does signify that the need to move on and start fresh. Try something radical or something that you would’ve never thought of, like going bunny blonde or try the latest rainbow hair color trend. Replenish and freshen up your closet. Throw out the dress you wore on your first date with him, and go to the mall and buy two more dresses to replace it. Change up your look, this will not only distract you but it will make you feel great and sexy!

7. Go Exploring

Post-breakup, you will find yourself with a ton of time that you don’t really know what to do with. Instead of filling that time with overthinking about that last times with your ex or eating an endless amount of Ben & Jerry, use that time to go explore. Whether it be around your city or even go for an extended vacation far away. Exploring your surroundings can also help you meet some new people and friends to hang out and spend your newfound free time with.

8. Buy a New Toy!

Now to itch that scratch that every human being has: your sexual needs. Unlike how the popular saying goes that in order to get over someone you must get under someone, a better way to move on without the assistance of yet another male entity is to try out a new toy! Going to your local sex store and finding a toy to fit your needs can definitely take up those nights in which you are feeling sexually charged and without another person present. Remember, you can do bad all by yourself. *Wink*

So, there you have it. Instead of wasting countless hours thinking of a guy that probably hasn’t spent a second on you, go out and try some new things and discover a new side of you. Post-breakup is a time to revive yourself and learn that yes, there is life after B.U. (break up). Have fun and strut your stuff!