When we have a significant other, we want everyone to know that they are ours. We want to parade around with them on our arm and let the world know this fine fella is taken. But when it comes to pet names, they are best used in moderation. Or even better, your partner was given a name for a reason – so you could call them that. Just a thought.
Babe is probably the most acceptable pet name. It’s casual; it’s easy. You can use it in a cheesy or serious way. It’s extremely effective in the whiny voice “baaaaaaaaabe” or if he’s pissing you off a short “babe” and a glare will do the trick. It provides that comfort everyone so desperately seeks that you are theirs and only theirs. Also, it’s a good indicator of how serious things are getting between the two of you! However, do not abuse it. Call them their name every once in a while for goodness sake!
Baby (or Baby Cakes)
Some people are a sucker for “baby” and I get it. It’s comforting, and in a way endearing, but cool it with the term baby. Baby is totally different than babe. Baby is a newborn, a child. Do you want your significant other looking at you as an infant?! Definitely not. Granted, it does slip off the tongue pretty easily. On that note, babycakes was cute in middle school but hearing it at this age makes me nauseous. So unless you’re using this pet name as “oh baby!” when he’s doing a good job, it’s best to keep it out of your vocabulary entirely.
When is it an okay time to use “bae”? Never. There are endless tweets that say “Bae means before anything else, I always thought it was another word for babe *insert red heart emoji here*”. The only good thing about this term is you can get away with not defining the relationship. Calling someone “bae” rather than boyfriend/girlfriend makes them yours but not necessarily only yours or your only one. For us slutty girls, that’s a definite perk.
These two are paired together because they are the kind of names a couple calls each other when they’ve been together awhile. Whether it’s a long-term relationship or a marriage it’s cute. It’s even cuter when old people say it! These are truly heartfelt terms of endearment that connote a beautiful and passionate love.
I’m indifferent on this one. Part of me wants to think I am a gift sent from God, but do I really want this man thinking I am perfect? That’s a huge expectation to live up to and personally, I am not even close to being angelic. It sounds sweet but being called an angel implies innocence to which I say “you wouldn’t have been saying that ten minutes ago”. If you’re trying to imply I look like a Victoria Secret model then I’ll gladly accept that compliment. It’s a sweet thought but it seems like something more along the lines a father would call his daughter and if you have daddy issues that’s a totally different topic.
Fuck yeah, I am royalty and damn straight you better treat me like it. Just don’t use it in a condescending tone because then I might have to punch you in the face. On a serious note, everything is good in moderation. It’s a term most every girl loves to hear because we all want to think we’re unique and special, but we’re not going to feel that way if you use it every day.
Random Nonsense Names
I am all for weird pet names. Call me something I have never heard before. I’ve been called dumpling and sugar face (what?). Or string a whole bunch of pet names together! Dearest buttercup gum drop darlin’ sexy love muffin. Weird is cute, right?
Be original! I most definitely don’t want to be called something you used to call your ex-girlfriend! If she used to be your “boo bear” and now I’m your “boo bear” well guess what! You’re about to have a new “boo bear” because I’m gone.
I think all men could learn a lesson from Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice when it comes to love and relationships. Lizzy gives the best advice for pet names when she suggests “My Pearl” and “Goddess Divine”. Men, if you’re really looking to win this lady over, you can’t go wrong with “Mrs. (insert your last name here)” her heart will melt. You’re welcome. And women, if he calls you that you’ve probably got a catch (or he’s just smart and reads sluttygirlproblems.com).