Before I was old enough to read Seventeen, my mother got me a subscription to Girl’s Life. At eleven, the articles were age appropriate for me. I read, with much curiosity, about toxic friendships, pads, tampons, and first kisses. My favorite article was about just that – kissing – and I kept the issue well into my teens. I was a late bloomer, forever wishing for my first kiss but nervous about getting it just right. I obsessed over those kissing tips, and as an adult am ashamed to admit I practiced smooching on my pillow more than once.
Once I reached adulthood, I stopped obsessing over kissing. Sex became the new thing to worry about, and in my late teens and early twenties I obsessively read Cosmo, wondering which tips worked and which I should skip. But now that I think about it, when it comes to meeting someone new or even spending time with a fling that’s become more of a long-term thing, there’s really nothing I love more than a good make out session. So why not endeavor to get kissing just as right as I used to back in the day? I scoured the internet and used my own personal experience to create a list of ten awesome kissing tips for you to try out.
1. It’s okay to suck
By which I mean – it’s okay to create suction with your mouth during a kiss. (No one likes a bad kisser.) Gently suck on your partner’s lips like you would on a lollipop. It especially feels nice if you lick along the lip while doing so. If you’re kissing a man, when he goes in for a French kiss, gently suck his tongue into your mouth as if you were, you know, giving him a blowjob.
2. Speaking of imitating a blowjob…
Kissing in a way that mimics sex can be very erotic. Sucking his tongue like you would when giving a blowjob is super sensual. You can also penetrate one another’s mouths with your tongues, then pull them in and out like you would thrust towards and away from one another during sex.
3. It’s not just about the mouth
Don’t forget about using your hands and body when you kiss! Run your hands through your hook-up’s hair. Grind your pelvis against his. Massage their neck with your fingers. Change the angle of their face with your hands. Wrap your arms around your partner’s body in an embrace. Don’t just focus on kissing. Touch is just as erotic and can still be hot without taking clothes off.
And as far as your partner’s mouth goes – that’s not the only place you can kiss. While passionate neck kissing feels awesome, in our older age we often worry about showing up to internships, work, family parties, etc. with a hickey. Even tame neck kissing can be hot. Don’t forget about the cheek, eyes, ears, etc.
You’re probably used to reading sex articles that tell you to talk to your partner about your likes and dislikes. Well, you can do that with kissing too! Rough bites, gentle nibbles, with tongue or without… Sometimes it’s easy to tell what turns your partner on, but there are occasions where you just don’t know, especially if you both are keeping all your clothes and remaining relatively tame for a little make out session. If you feel weird asking your guy or girl what they’re into, make sure to tell them what you like and dislike as it happens. They’ll likely feel more comfortable opening up to you in return.
5. Variety is the spice of life
Everyone has their own kissing style. When you’re in a long-term relationship, the two of you have gotten used to the other’s style and have worked together to make your own. Whether you’re two sloppy drunks who just met on the dance floor or a married couple, vary your kissing style to learn more about what your partner likes and to keep things interesting.
6. Please yourself
You’ve probably heard that you shouldn’t fake an orgasm. After all, it leaves you without an orgasm and your man thinking that what he did was right for you. He’ll just keep doing it again and again and you’ll never get off. Well, the same idea goes with kissing. For example, I’m not a huge fan of the French kiss. I like licking, but not tongue wrestling. I show my make-out partner what I’m into by keeping my tongue in my mouth and by pulling back from the kiss if he’s getting too slobbery. Make sure you’re enjoying the kiss and you’ll be so much more into it that your partner will have more fun too.
7. Don’t worry about what’s going to happen next
Maybe this is foreplay to the big thing; maybe this is just a smooch. Maybe you guys will be together a year from now; maybe this is just a one night deal. No matter what the situation is, kissing should be fun and sexy. Don’t spend the entire time worrying over what’s going to happen next. Live – and kiss – in the moment.
8. Rough it up
Whether you like it rough in the bedroom or not, hard kisses are amazing. When you make out, your body releases endorphins, making you less susceptible to pain. Subtly use force while kissing and it’ll build the heat so much. Nibble and bite on your partner’s lips, scratch your boyfriend’s back, tug your hook-up’s hair. It’ll feel sensual and exciting instead of painful and weird. And who knows? It might lead to steamier play or an experiment in BDSM.
9. Never stop kissing
Just because you’ve been having sex or dating the same person for years doesn’t mean you should stop making out with them from time to time. Not only is it amazing foreplay, but duh – it feels good. Maybe you don’t have time for even the quickest of quickies, but a deep, steamy kiss could leave the two of you excited for what will happen when you get together next.
10. Have fun!
When you were in eighth grade, you liked to make out because it was fun and exciting. Sometimes it may have caused a heat or a flutter deep in your belly, but for the most part you were just concerned about feeling close and adventurous with your partner. Keep that fun element about kissing with you your entire life and you’ll always enjoy a good snog, whether you’re prepping for your first kiss or about to embark on your thousandth.
Stay Slutty! XOXO