My first encounter with BDSM bars in Japan was right in the heart of Osaka. When I searched for S&M bars in Osaka, I found a few but there was one in particular that caught my eye because it has a very full-filling website with a lot of pictures and information about the atmosphere. It also has chain shop in Tokyo, so I decided it was the one, this was it… I need to visit this place!
The Experience
I planned to go by myself, but I thought it might be a liiiiiittle weird if I went alone at the first time. So, I asked my friend (who wasn’t interested in S&M) to take a look. When we went there, the décor looked similar to that of a jail, and when the S&M show ended, the performer crawled back to a room which looked like a jail gate. The show was stunning and fascinating and in a sense, it was beautiful. Later that night, I happened to get involved with the S&M games… spanking, whipping, and candle wax. Who was the victim? The customers sat beside my table. That’s the fun part…. you can always find someone to practice your skills with.
The second time I visited the BDSM bar, I wasn’t a customer anymore… I was a worker and a researcher. I started to serve drinks to the customers. The one sad thing about being there to work was that I wasn’t allowed to drink alcohol… only green tea! If not for that it would have been much more fun.
Why I Love It
When it comes down to it, the reason why I love to go there is that you can see such various worlds in a limited space. You look to your left and see a couple enjoying themselves, yet at the table next to them you can see three girls sitting together cosplay outfits. Then you look to your right and there’s a man receiving nipple bondage from a worker, and then, in the middle of the stage, another man is getting tied up and a dominatrix is dripping hot candle wax on him. What a world – welcome to a modern liberal society!
Even though I tend to be a submissive person, I often feel I have to act as a dominatrix. This is how I started to recognize my sadistic side. It’s so satisfying when you feel the power and at the same time, you know that you’re serving the masochist. It’s all about balance. Going to a BDSM bar in Japan helped me to find this balance, and explore both my dominant and submissive sides.
Sexual intercourse is not allowed in the bar, and showing of genitals isn’t allowed either but other than that everything is fine. Ball bondage, cross-dressing, transformation into a non-human, masturbation with panties on, erotic vibration play, and a whole lot of humiliation – it’s all up to you! It’s a free space to release your sadistic or masochistic desires and to share these with others if they so wish to.
Living in the Moment
Many people have asked me, “Won’t you feel strange showing yourself to strangers?”…oh come on! My answer to that is strangers are the best precisely because they are strangers! When you don’t know anyone who’s there, you can just BE YOURSELF! Let go of all the social restrictions, just try to understand yourself, try to read your own desires, and enjoy whatever sensation or feeling that comes to you.
In a way, BDSM is an alternative meditation because when everything seems to be sexual, then nothing is sexual anymore. More importantly, it’s not only about erotism or sex, it’s more about self-recognition and power sharing. Understand? No? Then check out an S&M bar in your neighborhood for a research to give it a try – then you will know what I’m saying.
Okay. It’s time for meditation!