Relationships seem to be everywhere and on Valentine’s Day, it’s a million times worse! Every year it gets to the point you can’t even open Instagram without seeing at least one cheesy couple’s picture that makes you want to turn on The Notebook and eat a pint of Ben and Jerry’s. After a few times of resorting to this type of behavior and you find yourself single on Valentine’s Day, again, you have to realize that you are single because you want to be! If you really wanted a partner that bad you would just settle for that ex that still wants you back or maybe even that creepy floormate that lives down the hall that sniffs your hair whenever you’re in the elevator together.
However, the truth is that you haven’t felt anything towards anyone recently (or ever) and that’s okay! I know the feeling and if I’m ever going to change my slutty ways, that someone has to be really fucking serious. I love my lifestyle of many drinks, many men, and lots of sex way too much to be accepting applications for a serious boyfriend. Or maybe you just don’t have any desire to find a partner today, tomorrow, or ever.
So instead of hating yourself every year on Valentine’s Day, you should celebrate love; the love you have for your friends and yourself. Instead of excessive crying and cuddling with your animal for all hours of your day on February 14th, get out and do these five things to celebrate yourself!

1. A Spa Day for Yourself (because you deserve it)

First spend the day hours with your first love, you! Get a massage, get your nails done, get waxed, and even a facial! Do whatever makes you feel pampered and relaxed.  Not only will you actually look smoking hot, but you will also feel smoking hot, and when you turn heads on Valentine’s Day, it will remind you that you’re single because there are so many hot people out there that want you! How could you even settle for just one?

2. Invite All Your Best Slutty Friends

An alternative to of all of you sitting alone and miserable, you can spend the time together and swap awesome sex stories, gush about your latest sexy hookup, and how you woke up in a bed that was not yours in a place you didn’t recognize. You walked back to your place in nothing but your clothes from last night, holding your heels, with straight-up stage makeup on. Only your best of friends would find these stories hilarious and the laughter will have you smiling all night.

3. Eat as Much Chocolate, Candy, and Ice Cream as Possible

Seriously, eat like there’s no tomorrow. It’s very easy to drown yourself in chocolate and I’m sure your friends would love you if you were to whip out a gallon of chocolate chip mint ice cream. You know you’re hot shit so why not spoil yourself and celebrate!

4. Buy Too Many Bottles of Wine

Being drunk makes everything easier and more fun. It wouldn’t be a night out with friends if multiple bottles of wine weren’t included in the plans!  Alternatively, try an evening of gourmet kombucha or handcrafted lattes instead if drinking just isn’t your thing.

5. Watch Sex and the City, Magic Mike, or The First Wives Club

Sex and the City is a classic show that many slutty girls can relate to. I can’t even tell you the number of times that my friends and I have compared ourselves to Samantha Jones, Carrie Bradshaw, Charlotte York, and Miranda Hobbes. Magic Mike is perfect for obvious reasons; I mean, who doesn’t want to see Channing Tatum dancing and grinding that amazing bod? I know watching that movie will get me into a great mood. Also, if you haven’t seen The First Wives Club, you are missing out. This is a classic movie all about depending on your friends, plus they end up taking all of their ex’s money!

After all of these amazing times with your fellow sluts, climb into bed, send a few sexts to your booty calls, and get a great night’s sleep! I promise you’ll have a lot more fun with your ride or dies, who will always be there for you, than another night at a packed restaurant listening to a random Tinder match vent about their feelings…