Sending sexually explicit texts has become a normal way to flirt in our generation. Whether it’s someone you have recently met, or the guy you have been dating for years, it is likely that at some point in your relationship, you’ll send or receive a sext. Sexting can make your relationship exciting and can be used to your advantage. It’s a fun and satisfying way for you to spice up your love life. By the time you’re done with your first sext session, he’s going to be begging to be acting out your fantasies in person. He will be completely inspired for your next steamy hook up.

Before you send your next sext, make sure you have these tips in mind.

Who to Sext

You can sext whoever your heart (or any other body part) desires.  Whether you’ve been in a relationship for years, or you’re swiping right on Tinder, I guarantee the boy you’ve been talking to will swoon when you send your first dirty text.

No matter who you’re sexting, the conversation is sure to inspire an over the top hook up, but don’t expect it to inspire a bouquet of roses and a romantic date.  He won’t be looking to sweep you off your feet or take you home to meet his mother.  All he’s going to care about is making you moan.  (But who’s complaining?)

Timing is Everything

Finding the perfect time to sext is half the battle itself.  To be fair to your man, you should make sure that you aren’t interrupting a huge meeting with his boss, or a lunch with his grandmother.  While being spontaneous and dirty when he’s caught up with something else can be fun, you’re going to want him to return the favor.  Pick a time where you will both be able to pay attention to each other and let your minds wander.

Finding a Balance While Sexting

Sexting can be really tricky. Since you’re a part of the virtual world, it seems like it’s not real. This can be both a good thing and a bad thing. For a beginning sexter, it might seem hard at first (no pun intended). You’re not quite sure exactly what to say or what to expect. As cliché as it may seem, in order to become an extraordinary sexter, you need to be true to yourself. Unlike engaging in real sex, in the virtual sexy world you’ve created, you don’t have to fake it. You have complete control. Finding a balance is key to having great sext skills.  Not only do you need to know what you want, you need to know what your man needs as well. Over time, you will find that sexting becomes second nature, especially the longer you have been with your man. You learn to know more about his likes (and fetishes) and he knows all about yours. Soon, you will be able to sext like a pro in no time.

Don’t Get Ahead of Yourself

After you get comfortable with sexting, it’s important to not get too extreme. Whatever you say while sexting will put ideas into his head. He’s going to spend the rest of his day thinking those nasty thoughts about you, and the next time he sees you he’s going to want to play out these virtual fantasies in real life. You need to make sure you are willing to do these dirty acts with him when the two of you finally meet up. Your man is expecting for you to live up to these sext-pectations.

If you’ve been wanting to try new things in bed, but have too afraid to mention it before – now is your chance. So while you’re dirty texting about your fantasy of being tied up and choked, you better expect just that the next time you’re in between the sheets.

Know the Risks

If you are going to send a NSFW picture, know what you are getting yourself into. First of all, if you are under the legal age DO NOT send a nude picture of yourself. Wait until your 18th birthday. You and your parents’ lawyer will thank me later. If you are above legal age and your naked picture doesn’t break any laws, be aware of the possible circumstances you are putting yourself into.

If you are one of the lucky ones, you are dating a wholesome and trustworthy man who will look at your pictures and keep them to himself. While he’s very proud to show you off in person, he understands that these pictures are for his eyes only. However, for the majority of us who are sending pictures, it’s probably best that if you do send a nude picture, your face isn’t in the frame (not because he doesn’t want to your face). You need to know that your very private pictures (and private parts) are most likely going to be passed along to other people. While your nudes probably won’t be the headline of a major news story, once your pictures are out in the digital world, they are potentially there forever.

If you are confident knowing that your pictures may be sent to someone else, by all means, go ahead and send those pictures. However, if you are hesitant at all, it’s probably best that you stick to using your words.

Whether you’re receiving unexpected dick pics or you’re making the first move, sexting is all about having fun. You know just what to say to get yourself and your guy going. Use it to your advantage. A little sexting can be the perfect way to spice up your relationship, or spark up a new flame.