So you just had your heart broken. Let me rephrase: you just had your heart ripped out, still beating, and stomped on – then set on fire – then the ashes were put in a bag full of shit – and that shit was put on a doorstep set on fire again – then thrown into a pack of wolves. This article is not for the everyday SG. This article is for those of us entering into the world of Slutty Girl Problems and looking for a little navigation. You’re heart broken, but you’re still a woman with needs. It can feel like a vast jungle out there full of new slang and crazy rules that are hard to understand, especially if you haven’t been in the game in a while. Luckily there are a few little rules that can keep you out of trouble when you’re in a healing process.

Practice Self Preservation

When a big part of our life leaves, we have a tendency to distract ourselves. You may have filled the void with Jane Austen movies and a large pint of Chunky Monkey, but that doesn’t mean you’ve gotten over it. And that guy you just met who you are fixating on a little too much might be a metaphor for something else. It’s okay to want to fill a hole just make sure the way you’re filling that hole (no pun intended) isn’t toxic to your health. That hottie who keeps toying with you may just be taking advantage of your situation. Make sure to practice self-preservation. When you feel like you’ve hit a wall, try spending the night at home instead of trying to prove your worth to someone else. Which brings us to our next matter at hand…

Be Picky

Have you seen yourself? Or did someone somewhere make you forget how awesome you are? You are a strong, fantastic, beautiful, and independent woman! Not every guy who shows a little attention is worth your time. You are worth the moon, the stars, and all the planets combined, and just because you are feeling a little wounded and in need of validation, don’t let anyone for even a second let you feel otherwise. Even if it’s just a fling – BE PICKY!

Ask Yourself: Is the Sex Toxic?

I know we’re all Slutty Girls, but let’s be honest here: sex is not a handshake. Sure it can be fun and carefree, but you’re still giving something to someone. It is always important to know your boundaries and limits. It is even more important to notice when you’re just getting off versus when you’re being self-destructive. If you’re suddenly digging on that hot guy friend who you’ve always been super close to, right after the break up is probably not the best time to hook up. If you need to get off, go outside your circle, be safe, and if it doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t the right time to get back in the saddle.

Always Put You First

Everything comes to an end, and having your heart broken is never a wonderful feeling. But sometimes things have to fall apart for you to pick up the pieces and design a new world of your choosing. You are amazing, sexy, smart, funny, fantastic, and beautiful from within! Whether or not you notice it right now. And don’t let any man (or woman) dull your shine. Not even for a second.