Foreplay is something that many people want to enjoy, but simply don’t know how to make happen. Foreplay is important for both female and male partners, but some people just aren’t comfortable with giving, especially at first. Most of the time, the hesitance that comes with giving foreplay is simply because you’re not sure what to do. It can cause you to feel self-conscious, which can make the act intimidating. Foreplay can also come with stigmas. Unfortunately, in our society, sex and everything that comes with it can be stigmatized. If you do certain positions or enjoy certain activities, you may feel ashamed. But you can overcome that and become comfortable with your body, your partner’s body, and what you both like.

So, we’re sharing with you some of the best methods that you can use to relax you and help you stimulate the mood with foreplay. Even if you’re self-conscious, the following tips will help you become more comfortable with the foreplay experience, both giving and receiving. Give them a try, and you’ll be a pro at foreplay in no time!

Try It Yourself

If you want to be comfortable with foreplay, you have to be comfortable with yourself. That’s right. This means touching yourself. Like really touching yourself. There are benefits to masturbation that you can really enjoy if you let yourself do it. Simply start by gently touching yourself, and then move from there. If you become comfortable with this, you can do this as a method of foreplay. There’s something sexy about a woman touching herself, so if you’re not confident in what you can do to him, think of what you can do to yourself to turn him on.

Use Clothing

Sexy lingerie can go a long way for someone uncomfortable with foreplay. Open cup bras, lingerie sets, and the like will certainly make an impact. Buy yourself something special from our favorite lingerie shops and show it to your partner. You’ll be amazed at how seeing you in something so skimpy is enough to turn them on.

Use Props

If you want to step things up slightly, consider props. There are a variety of toys, from more vanilla items to whips, chains, and other sex toys you can bring to the bedroom to make foreplay more enjoyable. Take some time to peruse a sex toy website and see what piques your interest, and then go from there.


Practice is what makes perfect, and your significant other will be more than happy to help you if you need to. If there’s something you want to try, tell your partner. Then try it. If it doesn’t work, move on. There’s no shame in that!

If you want to perfect the role before hitting the bedroom, practice on something else. For example, use a banana as a prop and play with it as you see fit. While brushing your teeth, slowly push your toothbrush down your throat to condition your gag reflex. There’s a lot you can do to practice, so find what works for you.

Take Lessons

Strip club dance studios are popular all over the US, so grab a few girlfriends and take a pole dancing class. These classes are designed for beginners, and it can be enough to give you the confidence you need to make an impact on your lover.

Do a Little Research

As mentioned above, sometimes the hesitation with foreplay comes with a lack of knowledge. If you truly don’t know what to do, do a little research. If you feel uncomfortable because of something that you or your partner like, look into it more. There is more information out there to help you learn exactly what to do as well to find other people who enjoy similar activities. Sometimes just knowing that there’s nothing to be ashamed of is enough to make your more comfortable with the act.

Talk to Your Partner

It may not sound like a conversation you would enjoy having, but communication with your partner is always key. If you are unsure about the type of foreplay that would interest you or your partner, talk with them about it. Express your issue. This way, you can find out exactly what it is that they like and how exactly they like it. You can also talk about things you like and dislike to ensure you’re both on the same page. When you openly communicate about your thoughts and fears in the bedroom, you’ll have a more enjoyable boudoir experience.

Don’t give up on foreplay because you’re scared. Let your freak flag fly — you’ll enjoy it.