Have you ever wanted to experiment with anal play, but you’ve been too nervous or shy? Maybe you want to try because your partner wants you to. First of all, never let someone pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do. However, if you have ever had the desire to experiment with anal play, then keep reading. Here are some tips to help beginners who have wanted to experiment with back door play but have been too scared, nervous, or shy to give it a try.

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What Not to Do

A lot of times, especially if you have a partner who is pressuring you to let them stick it in the back door, what they want you to do is get in the doggy style position and just let them put their dick in. Don’t do this right away. As this position allows for deeper penetration, if you have never done anal play this could hurt you and make you not want to try any anal in the future. You could miss out on a lot of fun. Not to mention, in the doggy style position, when you’re on your elbows with your ass in the air and your partner has a hold of you from behind, it can be scary for beginners because you feel kind of trapped and you can feel like you’re not in control.

Back door play can be very fun and stimulating! The G-spot can, in fact, be stimulated through the wall shared by the rectum and vagina. However, it is very important with back door play and really anything new you try in the bedroom (or backseat of a car) to make sure that you 100% trust your partner that’s playing with you. When you feel uncomfortable in a situation there’s nothing worse than wondering if they’ll stop when you say that safe word. Another tip before you get started on the steps for anal play for beginners, always use lubrication. Sticking any toy or play item in a dry hole can be painful, and it won’t glide as easy without lubricant. Plus, it’s just more fun with lube!

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Start out Small

When it comes to anal play you don’t have to jump straight into anal sex. Start out small and don’t start sticking just anything in. In the bath or laying in bed alone, use your finger or a small bullet vibrator and just rub the outside of your hole. Once you’re feeling aroused and in the mood, stick a small, wet fingertip in and wiggle it around a bit. The more you play this way, the more you can work on getting an entire finger in there and, believe it or not, enjoy it.

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Then, you can start introducing it into the bedroom with your partner! When you’re in the 69 position or when your partner’s going down on you, they can stick a finger in the back door. This small amount of anal play alone will add so much excitement to your bedroom play for both you and your partner.

Beginner Anal Toys

Now that you’ve mastered anal play with fingers and you now know you actually like anal play, you can start getting toys specifically made for anal play!  

Butt Plugs: A butt plug is exactly like it sounds: an anal toy that you stick just inside your anus. Butt plugs can be bought in smaller sizes so they go just inside the anus and they don’t go too far in. A lot of websites and stores you visit have a line of butt plugs that specifically say they’re for beginners. There are butt plugs of different sizes and designs and you will find the ones that you like best. Once you’ve used these beginners butt plugs you can move up to vibrating butt plugs that are even more stimulating than the regular butt plugs you’ve been using. Try having your partner put a vibrating butt plug in you while going down on you and leave it in when having vaginal sex to keep your G-spot stimulated from all angles. Check out all of the anal plugs we have reviewed here!

Anal Beads: Anal beads can look scarier than butt plugs because they are longer and they can go deeper than butt plugs do, but they are known to sometimes not be as wide. The exact definition of Anal beads is, “A sex toy consisting of several small balls attached together in series which are one by one inserted into and removed from the rectum.” Anal beads start with the smallest ball that gets inserted first, and then you or your partner keeps pushing them in one by one until the biggest one is inserted last. You absolutely do not have to put all of them in, especially not the first time if you’re not comfortable. Anal beads are meant to be left in during sex, oral, or other sexual acts. They are made to be pulled out by your partner very fast at the moment of your climax to make your orgasm even stronger.

If you prefer, you can leave them in because it will still be stimulating just having them in there. Also, sometimes when your partner has his penis in your vagina, he can feel the balls that are in your anus, causing extra stimulation for him, too. When shopping for your anal beads I personally do not recommend getting the anal beads connected by a string. As you can imagine, the string would be nearly impossible to keep clean vs the silicone anal beads that you can spray with toy cleaner or wash with soap and water. Once you’ve mastered regular anal beads, you can try vibrating anal beads for extra stimulation for the both of you. Check out the anal beads we have reviewed here!

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Now that you’re taking it slow and explored the beginning stages of anal play and realize it’s pretty great, you can start exploring more avenues of anal sex. If you’re happy where you are and don’t have a desire to explore anal sex deeper – then you do you and just enjoy where you are. Anal play can be so much fun whether you’re a beginner or a master. and we hope these tips help bring you the pleasure you deserve.

Stay slutty, and don’t miss out our other articles on anal sex for beginners:

A Beginner’s Guide to Anal Sex

5 Best Anal Sex Positions for Beginners