I write to you as the “single girl”. The girl who has been on far too many dates and has had far too few successful ones. The girl who is constantly talking to guys one day, and “dumping” them the next. The girl who’s love life you can’t keep up with. The girl who will always has the heart breaks, one night stands, and drinks way too much free booze.
I want to let you know – there is more to me than meets the eye. At times, the dating scene does suck. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be. Take a moment to listen up, and learn a little bit about my lifestyle…
Being Alone Isn’t That Scary
I’m perfectly fine without a boyfriend. I have time to figure out what I want to do with my life and who I want to be. I can take care of myself and totally do anything a guy can do. I am not alone. I am surrounded by amazing friends and family. When I’m ready and meet the right person, I will commit to them. I refuse to settle.
Sometimes I Wish…
I may appear to be immune to your little cuddles or your adorable little nicknames with your partner. But, I’m a bit jealous of it too. Sometimes I wish I had the pet names and went on long walks. I don’t resent you for being in a relationship. I am truly happy for you. Sometimes, it just makes me feel a bit lonelier.
Dating Fucking Sucks
Being single has its ups and downs. I meet some pretty crappy guys. I know that they aren’t the men I’m supposed to be with, so you can stop telling me that. It hurts when the guy you were talking to suddenly stops talking to you, or the kid who you eyed at the party hooks up with someone else. I don’t want to introduce you to my dates, because they all suck and I rarely get a second date. Trust me, when the right one comes along, I would love for you to meet him, gush about him, and tell me how well he treats me. But that day is not today. I respect myself and know how I deserve to be treated, it’s just not really happening yet.
Enough with the Random Set Ups
Please, I love you. But stop trying to set me up with your friends. You really do mean well, but, I rarely like them as anything more than a friend. Not even a fraction of how much I like you. I know playing match maker is fun and you want someone to go on double dates with, but I promise you, I would rather third wheel it then be set up with your cousin Jeffery.
Single Fucking Sucks (Sometimes)
It may look like fun and games but it’s a whole lot harder than it looks, trust me. Date night sucks. Events where you have to bring a date suck. Valentine’s Day? Forget it. I may put up a hard exterior and pretend like I’m totally okay, but I’m not always okay. I have my doubts. I wonder if there is something wrong with me, why I can’t seem to meet anyone, and why I put myself out there only to be shot down. Realize that it’s not all tequila shots and random corner make outs. There aren’t endless free drinks and countless parties with single, good looking, and half decent men. It is a rollercoaster ride I someday hope to get off of.
He’s Not My Boyfriend. We Just Have Sex.
I’m in my prime. In 10 years, I’m going to be married with three children – so why should I be so quick to ruin everything with labels? It may not be the way you wish to live your life but let me be wild, crazy, and young. Let me make mistakes. Stop assuming that Jake from down the hall and I will be married in a year and a half and that every guy I bring home is my Prince Charming. Let me get my heart broken and let me have good (or bad) meaningless sex. Just promise me you will support me no matter what and always be there for me as I figure out my life.
No, I Have Not Had Too Much To Drink
I have nobody to answer to. Nobody should tell me to get off the table, stop taking tequila shots, and stop flirting with that boy in the corner (unless he’s ugly). I can wander my eyes wherever I want to. I’m allowed to get attention. Let them buy me drinks. Let me get the confidence boost and meet a new friend. I know my limits, and if I wake up with a massive hangover tomorrow, you can insert the “I told you so” choir then. Not now.
Don’t Forget About Me
It’s probably hard to balance him and me. You’ve got a boyfriend now, I get it. He has needs and you have needs. But don’t forget that I have needs too. I need my friends to stay sane… to tell me I look fat as hell in that dress, or that puke yellow is really not my color. Still hold me when I cry and hold my hair back when I don’t know my limits. You may be his girl, but don’t ever forget who’s girl you were first. Try to spend time with me so that our friendship stays alive and there is no resentment. Don’t be one of those girls who ditches her friend for her boyfriend. Remember who loved you during your awkward braces stage and who took care of you after your first heartbreak. I promise I’ll remember you.
This Doesn’t Change Anything
I get it, I get it. I’m single tearing up the dating scene, being bought drinks by cute boys, and sometimes even ugly boys, while you are in a relationship. On paper, our lives are very different. We are at two different stages and have two different mind sets. But this doesn’t change anything. You are still my friend, my ride or die, and my partner. I loved you when you were single and I love you now that you are in a relationship. You’re still my Partner in Crime.
I love you and love your lifestyle. I’m glad you are happy. I will forever support you and hold you when you are heartbroken or just need a good cry. So try not to judge me when I bring home my future one night stand or when I drink one too many tequilla shots. I’ll meet him eventually and we can both totally freak out once it happens!
Sincerely,
Your Single & Fabulous Friend